Author: Tamara Belanger (Page 2 of 73)

We’d met Keira on an online woman’s group and decided after a whirlwind morning in the city to take a bus to Suwon to meet her in person for the first time. Suwon, while still a city, is much older and has that…..THIS is what I thought of when I would picture Korea vibe. The town and its people are mostly older; not the slick fast pace of Seoul. Keira came to the country on her own a few years back and is now a wife to Chanho and a mother to little Ellam. Life is a challenge for them here. Money is hard to come by, jobs that pay the bills are difficult to find close enough to home to make it worth it. Their apartment is small, storage is at a premium and Keira has become adept at finding ways to find solutions.

We put Ellam in his stroller, his little egg cookies in a package to stave off dinner time for a chance to get out and show us around. I find it hard to keep up with my friend and the girl, my eyes hungry to wrap this place around me and have it forever in my mind. It’s hard to walk and look and imagine and keep my balance. My eyes gravitate to the people I see, for there are the stories, the pattern in the fabric. I hear a scraping sound ahead of us and look to see a bent elderly woman making it across the street with her walker one. small. tiny. scrape. at. a. time. Our eyes meet as I come right up to her, to walk past her, her mask hiding the rest of her face. We will never know each other but for that small moment we saw each other at the intersection of Kentucky and Suwon and a lump formed in my throat from the profoundness of it all. Just past her, a weathered little man is making his way up a steep hill, his cane keeping him upright. What have they seen in this life? I long to have a go between sit with us and ask.

We strolled by businesses in spots I wouldn’t have thought anything much could fit, some of them crude and rough looking to my western eyes…..but this is their livelihood, their place in the world. There are men getting haircuts, women picking out fruit, children playing in a small park. Just like us.

We started back to Keira’s apartment as the sun began to set. Little Ellam was hungry and we needed to catch the bus back to Gangnam. The girl stood in the archway of an old fortress once providing safety for this town. I snapped her picture and look at my camera. It felt like a validation. We were here. We saw you. We will remember you.

Tuesday I met Sujin. My friend, Sarah, a transplant from Wisconsin to Misa, wanted to show me her town, the english school she and her husband own and her dear friend. She graciously met me at our subway stop and accompanied me to her area. As we walked up from underground, the blue sunny sky almost sang. We stopped for coffee and started for the park. I could see Sujin from a distance as she waved at us. I loved her immediately.

I asked if I could give her a hug, the American greeting I am so used to. We stared into each others’ eyes….both of us amazed at the miracle of sitting together. I told her my story, she told me hers. Sujin has a husband and two children and a God that she loves. She met Sarah at church. In Korea, older and younger people are not usually “friends”. There is distance there. Sarah, 20 + years younger than Sujin, surprised her by asking to go for coffee together. That was four years ago. And on this day, I was welcomed into that circle.

Sarah , Sujin and I walked across the park to Compassion English School, named after Compassion International, an organization that Sarah’s husband has a particular heart for. They sponsor 50 children with a portion of the proceeds they earn from their school. The pictures of the sponsored children form a heart on the wall of the classrooms. One day they hope to sponsor another 50 more.

Two of her students arrive to class early and they tumble in like little puppies. Sarah has them greet me in their best english. “Hello! Nice to meet you!” My heart melts into my shoes. They pull out a game and sit on the floor. On the walls around them Sarah has placed some of the students’ work and I stand in front of it and love them without even knowing them.

It’s time to head back on the subway and Sarah worries that I will be ok to make it to the station and home alone. Sujin quietly says to Sarah, “I’ll go with her all the way.” She is as bad at directions as I am and yet she is willing. She has never been to my station and hasn’t ridden the subway in quite awhile. We grab hold of each other and giggle our way to the station through all the transfers and stops. We snap a picture victorious and send it back to the girl and Sarah to let them know we made it! “I am so honored to meet you!” we both say at almost the same time. I ask if she will be alright going back. “Yes! Remember, I can ask for directions if I get lost. Remember, I’m Korean!” Ah, yes you are, indeed. I’d forgotten. “We are now friends forever.”

When the dream of going to Korea first poked it’s head up in the soil of our hearts we talked about wanting to create a diary that would become a gift to others and a treasured collection of memories for ourselves. For me, living is a constant process of writing about it in my head. I “record” it as movies in mind and will frequently get lost in my head with my words when I’m experiencing something I want to keep alive.

Naomi means beautiful music. We had her name painted on a banner in Chinese characters by a craftsman when we went to China to gather her up into our family those 21 years ago. She’s no singer, which she would readily tell you….:D….but her life sings a song of miracles. To be found on a street in her country, brought to an orphanage and adopted into a family in another country thousands of miles away, healthy and curious is itself no small thing. She has always seized learning new things with a self motivation that left me startled. As a child, she taught herself how to knit on the computer, read books well beyond her age level, joined in with little fear to new groups, new situations. She had a quiet, determined confidence.

After graduating high school with honors, she went on to college with a full scholarship. She has continually set her sites, lined her arrow up and shot with unbreakable focus. So came the evening when she first said “internship abroad” and what did I think….my head snapped up immediately. I could hear my father’s voice to me when I was young. “Travel is the best education. Always say yes to it.” I stepped on Naomi’s words…..”Apply. But before you do, know that you will get a green light. They will want you. Are you ready to say yes?” Within a week she had her interview. 6 a.m…..all make up and blown dry….sitting before a screen talking to someone across the globe. I paced outside her door trying to hear what across the globe sounded like. Two days later; “Congratulations! We would like to welcome you into Beyond Academy!” We grabbed hold of one another and jumped up and down like school girls on the playground! My miracle girl had hit her target again!

A few days later, she had a “match”. A company in Seoul, Korea wanted to talk to her about an internship. Another early morning, more make up, just the right lighting, she sat in front of her screen and wowed them. By the end of the 30 minutes they already told her they would like to have her on board. It was a Korean beauty product company seeking to expand globally. The girl was going to Seoul!

And then, it dawned on us. My beautiful son is from Seoul. Unlike China, when you adopt from Korea they allow for a “courier” to bring your child to you. Without having a resource to watch our other children at the time, we were not able to go to Korea. In my mind, then, Naomi came from China; Solomon came from the airport. I had always longed to see Korea. And that’s when the girl said the magic words….why don’t you come with me and settle me in. I all but packed right then, except money. I had more extra socks than extra money.

God? Is this a dream bud growing? Should I water this or let it die? “Ask and you will receive. Knock….” And so I started wondering how to knock. I love to serve. I would come over and gladly do your laundry for a cup of coffee; drop your cat at the vet, take your kids to the park. When I can find my place in the room to serve, I am “home”. So, I set out to serve and hung up my banner…..and people came calling. Within the week the answer was delivered to my heart. “Water your dream.”

And then Russia. What does this mean, God? Should we go? Can we go? “David and Goliath is a true story. Keep watering.” And so we water, we forge friendships with those in Korea that have become people we care about, check on, learn from. We search flights and air b and b’s and make lists and check dates. And I am reminded of my favorite verse; one that continues to make itself known in my life.

“Sit still, my daughter, that you may learn how the matter turns out.” – Book of Ruth 3:18. So, we proceed with our hands while we “sit still” in our hearts. Naomi created a title for our blog/instagram by spelling out how her name will be pronounced in Korea. Seoul, we love you already.